H: Fast times at Engagement High

Josh and I met and knew very quickly that we were not leaving each other, ever. Aside from divine intervention or the contemporary notion of falling in love, we don't know why. We have a slew of reasons about what you'd expect involving love and our life together (we get along, we're best friends, we're incredibly happy, blah blah blah) but there was something else there. Something that told us that this was a part of our fate, and when I say "fate" I'm not talking about the "falling into a mountain in the throes of martyrdom" fate. I mean more along the lines of "there's a higher power, and you can do whatever you want but if you go along with this it will most likely bode very well for you" kind of fate. We just KNEW. Hand in hand with just knowing beyond doubt or explanation that we were right.
What this translated to in our reality is two and a half months after we met, we had moved in together. A month after that we were engaged. Quick? Absolutely. Unusual? It was for us. Wrong? Certainly, absolutely and without a doubt not.

And apparently, we're not alone.
I've met more and more people during my engagement remarking that they KNEW that their mate was the one for them very early on in their relationship. A few of these I already knew about and needed no explanation; my parents were married six months after they met and just celebrated their 29th Wedding Anniversary while my Aunt Patty and Uncle Dennis KNEW after their first date (married 30 years now). But more recent than that, I've talked to other engaged women my age and several (not all of course) have remarked that they knew this person was their intended mate very early on in their relationship. By "early" I'm talking everything from the first date, to four months in the ring had been purchased. It's really interesting and often unexpected.
Josh and I wanted to be cautious with our hearts and had set up a timeline of when x, y, and z would happen. We had decided we would go very slowly, lots of baby steps. At least six months until we considered using the "L" word, a year until we'd consider moving in together, and another year until we'd consider marriage. We laugh about it now because somehow we accomplished all that within three months. *shrug* :-)

Regardless of the frequency with which this occurs, when we got engaged we still got flak from friends and family (all of which were young friends and family) thinking it was too soon. This was understandable so we knew we'd have to prepare ourselves to address concerns and assure them that - even though this was unexpected and not characteristic of either of us - this was right. Some of the flak came from expected places (my brother was none too happy but he's my big brother and that's his job) and some were unexpected (one of my now former best friends. Now THAT was a frustrating, infuriating, disappointing, but mostly heartbreaking experience).

On the opposite side of the spectrum, some places where we thought or were worried we'd find disapproval were the most supportive. My parents are an example of this, though not too surprising they were so supportive; obviously they understood as evidenced by their 29 years together. Plus, they're just supportive parents in general. I lucked out, I know. Josh's family was also very supportive and I'm very fortunate to be marrying into such a wonderful family.
When we got back from Disneyland (the site of our engagement) we immediately headed two places; Mom's and Jeff and Danielle's (Josh's brother-in-law and sister). Mom's reaction when we told her we were getting married was to walk up to me with a concerned look on her face and ask "now this is very important...do you have a date yet? Everything goes off the date!" Laura, Josh's Mom, gave me a hug and welcomed me to the family, and Jeff and Danielle were amazed that we weren't already married (or as Jeff put it "I thought you guys were going to come back married!" *turns to Danielle "didn't I say they'd come back married?" hahaha).

I had one set of amazing, wonderful, and timeless friends that I will forever be grateful for, and these were the darling people that said "Well, we're not so sure about this and we don't agree, but we love you and support you." Later on this became "we approve".
Incidentally, one of my best friends in the whole world pointed something out to me the other day. He said "you can disagree with someone; it doesn't mean you're right". I think that's one of the top three most validating and humbling things anyone has ever said to me and I'm very, very grateful for it.

We didn't do the "fairytale" love. There were no thunderbolts, no dreams in which a spirit guide says that in two weeks, four hours, 17 minutes and six seconds you will meet the man you're meant to marry. If someone told me that for Christmas 2008 I'd be getting a husband I would have said they were nuts (and then wondered if it was true).
We LOVE each other. The kind of comfortable, passionate love that some people can only dream about; the kind that sometimes will make my heart come out my eyes. When I fell in love with Josh, I felt like I had been let in on a special secret that was so very, very obvious all along.

Josh and I are happy. We are incredibly happy. We are incredibly, totally, and incandescently happy. Sometimes I think we're happier than two people have a right to be.
But what it came down to for Josh and I and was it still comes down to is that we needed each other. When that was over, we wanted each other. Now that we want each other, we need each other again. It's a wondrous and sometimes confusing aspect of life, but to be honest I couldn't be happier with it.