H: How holy are we, anyway? Part 2

We met with the Karla, the matrimony coordinator yesterday. She reminded me a bit of my devout paternal grandmother, if she were younger, had the holy glow, and was perhaps a bit more spry. However it worked, I really liked her. I don't know exactly what I was expecting, but I'm glad she was there. I didn't feel weird being there with her, which was awesome. She had this way about her, just full of positive energy and she really helped to put me at ease. PLUS, when we told her about what the priest in Woodland told us, she looked greatly perturbed and told us we should call him back and tell him to stop giving parishoners incorrect information. Actually, no, she said. I'LL call him.
See, what we're doing is a Convalidation (having our marriage blessed and validated in the church), which is something that I only heard about once I started researching this whole shindig. At the time of meeting with the priest in Woodland, I'd never heard of one, and he mentioned NOTHING.
Again, I really liked her.

We didn't stay long...just long enough to fill out a bit of paperwork and the Focus test. I say "test", but really it was more of a 150 questions assessment, more if you have to fill out additional sections (which I did). It was reminiscent of those standardized tests I took as a kid; a booklet that you don't write in, plus a scantron sheet for bubbling. But the difference is the questions are about a sentence long, and the answers consist of Agree, Disagree, and Uncertain (or A, D, U). It was pretty interesting and, I felt, unobtrusive. It seemed like less of a compatibility test and more of an assessment...where does our relationship need work versus where are we completely in sync? Some were specific (i.e: have you discussed how you will raise your children with regard to the church?), and some were not (i.e: are you concerned with finances?).

Then there was the section for non-Catholics (me) with questions regarding if I'm aware of the church's expectation that our children will be raised in the faith, etc. which also turned out to be pretty interesting. Josh and I took a moment to discuss that one (again). He asked me if I was comfortable with it, as this is something that I'd go back and forth on. On the one hand, I like how I was raised. My parents didn't raise us in organized religion because they didn't want us to care if someone told us that they were Jewish or Catholic or Muslim, etc. And I don't. What I get from that is that during their time in the Catholic church, they must have witnessed a lot of discrimination towards other religions (which in my opinion - as an outsider looking in - is part of what causes problems like wars and genocide) and wanted us to avoid that, which is fair enough. On the other hand, I can think of times in my life where the structure and the community of organized religion would have been helpful for me, and I'd want that for my kids, too. Josh summed it up by mentioning that we're our own brand of Catholic, and I eventually determined that I was completely okay with having them baptized. Plus, I get to pick the Godparents.

We got a few other things out of the way; figuring out that we want Father McFadden (who is actually retired...but apparently likes doing weddings and baptisms since they are - in his opinion - the fun part of being a priest and they have much, much less paperwork), and getting a few options of when we have our ceremony. Apparently, we could do it in the middle of the week if we so chose! Considering that it will be Thanksgiving week and our families will be in town (part of why we chose November 20th in the first place), I think it would be perfect! Josh and I have yet to discuss that at any length though. Anyhoo, our meeting -short as it was - was a positive experience, and I'm very much looking forward to going back again next Monday.